| But Then Face to Face |
| Summary: | While Dertan and Susanna play the chess game they had planned on, Jarret happens upon the room. |
| Date: | 6 July 2018 |
| Related: | http://eternalcrusade.wikidot.com/log:1874-06-24-a-meeting-of-the-martial-minds, http://eternalcrusade.wikidot.com/log:1874-07-02-through-a-glass-darkly |
| NPCs: | None |
| Players: |
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| Room Name |
| Room description |
| 1874-07-06 |
One of the tables within the Alnburg library is being used as the focal point of a chess game
between Dertan and Susanna. Dertan is sat with his typical trained posture at the black side, having
told Susanna that she would play white, and whilst he looks very finely dressed in the black damask
of his doublet and trousers it is not anything particularly unusual for him. There is some question
about his ability to actually truly relax. A glass of some rich red wine or liquor is by his side
but he either hasnt consumed much of it or it has recently been topped up. Earlier on, when his
drink was delivered, he had one given to Susanna as well. The game seems to have been going on for a
little while with no obvious domination by either side.
Looking across at the board Dertan slides one of the pieces into its new position and then leans
back in his chair to lift his glass and appraise the woman across from him. "Are you going to
explain why you were on board the Longship?"
Susanna doesn't exactly appreciate being talked to like a child in that way and she keeps her gaze
set on the board, contemplating her move for a while before setting that thought aside and glancing
up at Dertan with a composed and slightly sheepish smile. "I do think I can readily blame my dress,"
she says lightly.
She currently wears the dress in question: a silvery-blue silk affair with fancy sleeves and
neckline that reaches from the tip of one shoulder to the other, again revealing that deep, badly-
healed scar. It's the same dress she has always worn.
"You are going to need to explain that." Dertan replies without moving. "I don't see how your dress
can be to blame. You are quite lucky that the Jarl did not seem to notice you."
Heavy steps can be heard outside, and soon thereafter, the door opens and Jarret enters. He doesn't
look around, moving straight for one of the bookshelves, in silence for now. He also looks like he
hasn't slept since they got back.
"Well, Your Excellency, I try to keep this dress in proper condition, and its disuse greatly
improves those chances," she elaborates, starting to think that either her crime or the situation
she became caught up in was more serious than she thought. The vague hook of her story was supposed
to intrigue Dertan. "So, seeing as you were busy and seemed that you would continue to be for some
time, I changed into my other dress. Doing so, I think I was mistaken as a servant of the household
and, since I was idle, someone asked me to help load the ship the Jarl happened to be sailing. Much
to my surprise, I was still on board when it set off from port."
Susanna doesn't notice Jarret yet, her attention on both the game and the irritated Dertan.
"I see." Dertan replies in that flat sort of tone that suggests he doesn't really. That is about
when Jarret shows up and he moves to his feet. "I hope we are not inconveniencing you my Lord."
Jarret doesn't seem to have heard Dertan at first, just moving over to the shelf, to pull out one
book and picking up something behind it, before putting it in a pocket. Putting the book back, he
frowns a bit as he turns, blinking as he spots those present. He doesn't say anything yet, though.
Susanna stands with Dertan as a sort of instinctual thing, and her face lights up at the sight of
Jarret: her only noble friend from the war, even if in truth they did not see much of each other. It
certainly is a pleasant change from Dertan's stern uncomprehending attitude as she tries to explain
her innocence.
She curtsies to Jarret respectfully, addressing him still by his military title. "It is a pleasure
to see you, Sir Jarret Sokar."
Dertan considers the most appropriate course of action to take in the face of Jarret ignoring him
and in the end chooses to turn back to the game. He gestures for Susanna to sit and then does so
himself. He's studying her, taking in the pleasure she shows at Jarret's appearance, even as he says.
"It is your move Susanna."
Jarret watches the two of them for a few moments longer, his expression looking a bit surprised,
before he nods a bit slowly, offering a smile to Susanna. "It's a pleasure to see you as well," he
replies, after a few moments of pause, before he looks to Dertan again. He looks like he's about to
say something, before he pauses. "Dertan. Why so bloody formal today?" It's asked a bit quietly.
Susanna beams to be smiled at by anyone right now, and especially by the good and honorable Sir
Jarret. She almost doesn't notice Dertan's request to sit and concentrate on her next move, though
she does so obediently, studying the board for some opportunity in the arrangement of pieces. She
hears Jarret's question loud and clear, of course, and it distracts her a little to think that these
two men might be friends somehow. She puts her hand on a piece she had an idea for and narrows her
eyes at the board.
Dertan is a little surprised by Jarret's question. He looks across to his cousin, frowning a touch.
"I have a guest." That answer is part avoidance and part answer.
Jarret shakes his head a bit at Dertan's words. "That's no need to be so formal…" he remarks,
before he shakes his head a little again. He glances around once more, looking a little lost in
thought.
Susanna at last decides on her move, firmly places her knight, and says, "I have known Sir Jarret
since I was sixteen, Viscount. He has always been very kind toward me and my f—my family and I." A
bit of color comes to Susanna's cheeks and she rubs her nose before putting both hands in her lap.
She's starting to remember Jarret was there when she made her own little declaration during that
senate meeting on Juin 24.
Dertan exhales slowly as he lets Jarret's words sink in but somehow, at the end of that, he does
look as if he's at least trying. It is subtle of course. A slight imperfection in his posture. He
moves to start introductions but then Susanna drops that bombshell and disrupts that plan as well.
For a moment he is simply silent as he mvoes his hands to rest upon the back of his chair. He has
yet to return to his seat. Then he chooses to tell her. "Susanna was just trying to tell me a story
about how she managed to end up on the longship because of her dress. You always used to enjoy
stories. Would you like to join us?"
Pausing for a few moments to pull out a flask of his pocket and take a brief sip, Jarret nods a
little, moving to find himself a seat. "Yes, we've known each other for a while… When did you come
to Alnburgh?" He nods again as he hears Dertan's words, before he blinks. "Wait… on the longship?"
"Yes, Viscount Kaedon invited me to Alnburgh by airship a few days ago so I could play this game of
chess with him," Susanna says pleasantly, perhaps trying not to show too much awareness of how
ridiculous this makes Dertan sound. "Unfortunately, he was busy for a while, so I decided to take
care of my dress by letting it rest and wearing my other clothes. I was mistaken as a servant of the
household, and asked to help load the ship. Before I knew it, it had taken off while I was still
putting down boxes below deck." She smiles a little, in good humor. "It was quite a shock for
someone who had never been out to sea before." Quite a shock.
Dertan goes to pick up a chair for Jarret before calling for another glass of wine. It has to be
better than whatever is in that flask right. "I thought she was doing fair enough." Dertan says.
"Until she froze up and attacked one of my men." A glance at the board is followed by him giving
Susanna an almost curious look and retaking his seat. "Why did you do that?" He moves a pawn to
counter her knight.
Jarret raises an eyebrow in Dertan's generation as he listens, looking a bit curious, before he nods
a bit. Taking another brief sip from the flask, he lets out a breath. "Ah…" He looks about to add
something more, but goes silent again.
Susanna folds her hands in her lap, looking quite embarrassed and uncomfortable for this to have
been brought up in front of someone she admires. Nevertheless, she makes an attempt to explain
herself.
"It is…hard to explain, Your Excellency," she starts quietly. "I have told you before about these..
.intruding memories I often have. They are quite unwelcome. I think…when I heard that cannon fire
it…it sort of took me into the past." Looking for something to relieve her suddenly dry mouth, she
takes up her glass for a sip of wine, eyes closed. "And…because of the nature of that past, when
that man touched me I thought he was attacking me." With a curdled feeling in her stomach, Susanna
realizes just how insane this sounds and imbibes a larger portion of her wine.
Faced with the discomfort of having to talk about feelings, nightmares and other such things Dertan
decides that it is time to change the subject. "Have you had a chance to see the young eagle Jarret?
It really is astonishingly large. I am trying to decide if it could perhaps be taught to take a fox.
Susanna folds her hands in her lap, looking quite embarrassed and uncomfortable for this to have
been brought up in front of someone she admires. Nevertheless, she makes an attempt to explain
herself.
"It is…hard to explain, Your Excellency," she starts quietly. "I have told you before about these..
.intruding memories I often have. They are quite unwelcome. I think…when I heard that cannon fire
it…it sort of took me into the past." Looking for something to relieve her suddenly dry mouth, she
takes up her glass for a sip of wine, eyes closed. "And…because of the nature of that past, when
that man touched me I thought he was attacking me." With a curdled feeling in her stomach, Susanna
realizes just how insane this sounds and imbibes a larger portion of her wine.
Faced with the discomfort of having to talk about feelings, nightmares and other such things Dertan
decides that it is time to change the subject. "Have you had a chance to see the young eagle Jarret?
It really is astonishingly large. I am trying to decide if it could perhaps be taught to take a fox.
Absolutely no one has described Susanna's strange flashbacks as "reasonable" before, and, much to
her dismay, Jarret's words have quite an affect on her. Tears spring to her eyes upon hearing this
validation, this comforting pat, and with the hem of her sleeve she stalls them as quickly and
surreptitiously as she can. "Thank you, My Lord," she offers in return, her smile weak but grateful,
and is equally disconcerted by Dertan's change of subject. "…Are you a falconer?" she blinks,
sniffing.
Dertan gives Jarret a lengthy look and then Susanna before moving to his feet. "I have an idea for
my artillery project" he lies. "I need to retire and get it down before I forget. Excuse me please."
Jarret pauses for a few moments as he watches Dertan head off, blinking momentarily. "Huh…" he
begins, before he goes silent again, watching the door a bit carefull.
Susanna is frozen with anxiety. "Did…did I say something wrong?" she asks, staring at the door
Dertan left through.
"It's okay," Jarret replies, quietly. "He's like that from time to time." There's a brief pause, as
he seems to consider something. "Your sisters…?"
"I'm lucky enough to have a friend in Four Corners who could take care of them while I am away. I
trust they will be alright." Susanna smiles. "Thank you. And…how is your family?"
Jarret smiles, "I'm glad to hear that." There's a brief moment of pause, before he lets out a bit of
a breath. "My family… They're doing well. I sent them back to Dalcen, since it's a bit better
guarded. Hope they can survive being near my mother." Was there a touch of bitterness there? "My
sister seems to still have the edge out there, though…" A nod in the direction of the waters.
"Oh no, is your mother that unpleasant?" Susanna asks with a nervous smile, unaware of who Jarret's
mother is. "I hope she is at least good with your children? At least, I was under the impression
that you have children," Susanna shrugs. "I suppose your sister is in the navy."
"She's…" Jarret begins, before he grimaces a little. "She's not easy to get along with. And a
quite busy person, which I guess is how she managed to bring the House all this way." There's a
brief pause, before he adds, "Well, my oldest son, Sandor… Mother doesn't like him, because he's a
bastard." There's a brief pause again, before he smiles a bit at the mention of his sister. "She
commanded the other frigate in our little fleet yesterday. She's generally a far better captain than
me."
Susanna shows immediate interest and sympathy in Jarret's son. "Oh no… That must be terribly
troubling for him. Sandor, you said? A charming name. How old is he?"
Susanna is surprised and excited to hear about Jarret's sister. "Oh my! I do wish I had been more
about my wits, so I could see her good work. From what I could see, everything was done very well
indeed! We were attacked and yet came out…quite alright, yes? Not too many casualties?"
"He's… five or so, I think… He was born a little while after Goldhollow, during the last war…"
Jarret replies, before he grimaces momentarily. "Yes, we got out of it quite alright." There's a
brief pause, and he frowns, "Not thanks to the White Hallers…" Sounding a little irritated.
"…Are they not supposed to be experts in sailing?" Susanna wonders aloud, internally wondering
what exactly it was they did.
Jarret sighs, "They are, but when they're part of a fleet, they're also supposed to follow fleet
command." It's said a bit thoughtfully, before he lets out a breath. "I was close to bring in our
other ships to save them if they didn't get out when they did, which would have led to more losses
than we had." He sighs, momentarily.
Susanna looks at Jarret with studying, sympathetic eyes. "You take your command very seriously."
"I do. There are many people depending on me, after all," Jarret replies, before he pulls out that
flask again, and takes a sip. "And I don't need more lives weighing on my mind…" That last part is
said rather quietly.
Susanna's eyes shift down to the incomplete chess game before she can stare at at Jarret with too
much admiration. "It cannot be easy for you, Sir Jarret, to think in this way…letting the lives of
others weigh on you. Yet I do want you to know that your doing so brings me much comfort." She
pauses a little, briefly biting her lip in hesitation before she decides to plunge on.
"I was wrong to speak above my station in the Great Hall in Firen. I have been cursing my
foolishness nearly every day since then, wondering how that kind of audacity overtook me so. But
when I examine my soul, I know that, at the heart of it, it is because I was scared for the loss we
will suffer fighting on three fronts. Loss and suffering, I believe, should be prevented at all
costs, and I was frightened that many speakers there seemed…almost eager for it. Perhaps I mistook
their tone, and they are merely doing what I in my naivete cannot see is right. Yet I have never
mistook yours. You have always let my family and I know that…that our lives are worth protecting.
That you care for our welfare. The price of compassion is…is a heavy one. But I cannot repay the
hope and goodness your compassion has brought us."
Her speech over, Susanna lets out a long, shaky breath. Perhaps she is afraid of stating any sort of
opinion at all in front of a noble at this point, even if it is meant kindly. She doesn't seem to
know what to expect in reply.
Jarret pauses as he hears her words. "You did so because you cared about something. I would never
say that is wrong, even if it may not have been the… best choice with some of the more stuffy
people present," he offers to her, before he sighs, "Trust me when I say that if there was a way to
solve this without battle, most people in that room would do what they could for it to be that way."
He pauses a bit as he hears that last part, offering her a quiet smile. "I'm glad to hear that I
have managed to bring some goodness to you and your family, Susanna."
Susanna is even further astonished at Jarret's validating words, and she smiles back at him. "And I
am glad to hear that I can bring you some gladness! I… Well, it is obvious that something troubles
you." She pauses, and looks down at her fingers with a growing coldness in her eyes. "…Viscount
Kaedon has informed me that he executed the family of a traitor. A family with children. I know the
Sokars were involved… If any part of this had to come under your responsibility, I cannot imagine
your troubles."
"He had to, under orders from Mother," Jarret replies, letting out a breath as he takes another sip
from his flask, a slightly longer one. "There was a…" He pauses, debating how much to say. "A very
bad man that was trying to kill all of the Sokars. He used that man's family to lure me, Dertan…
Viscount Kaedon, that is… And our cousins Lianna and Brennart into a trap in an inn, then the
traitor locked it from the outside and set fire to it, while we had to fight the man he helped
inside, where he had trapped the Viscountess Kaedon and their children." He speaks slowly, and
quietly, expression rather pained. "The man had to die for his treason, and I had to execute him, a
few days ago, on Mother's orders again." There's another pained grimace, "I wish his family wouldn't
have to die, though…" There's a deep breath, before he adds, "I hope you won't hate all of us for
it, but I understand if you do…"
Susanna's folded fingers tighten as she watches Jarret's expression. A pause of thoughtfulness and
recontextualization follows his words. "I don't hate all of you," she says quietly. "I am finding
the effort exhausting, in any case, especially as uneducated as I am about your politics. I want to
think rightly, yet I jump to conclusions. And for this I apologize." Another pause, and her voice is
just slightly louder with her next sentence. "Yet I do know that it is utterly reprehensible to
trade the lives of children, which is something both that traitor and your mother have done."
Susanna looks up at Jarret, and surprisingly there is compassion and concern there despite her sense
of justice. "My Lord… I hope it is not out of turn to ask, but you seem to be familiar with
Viscout Kaedon. He tried to convince me that his actions were correct. Does he really believe this?"
"I'm glad to hear you're not hating all of us," Jarret replies quietly as he watches her. He nods at
the part about trading lives of children. "I know. It's one of the many things I will do my best to
change the day I inherit her position…" He pauses as he hears the rest of it. "Dertan? I think so,
or at least that they were unavoidable. My cosuin has always been one of those that feels certain
things has to be done." He sighs, "He's not a bad man, just… a hard one, I guess…"
"I'm having a hard time reconciling that," Susanna says. "He believes it was right that he murdered
innocent children. And an innocent woman, as well. He says it is for the strength of the country,
but it isn't. Violence against the innocent is never strength! It is cowardice and thuggery. Killing
that family was NOT justice. It was using fear as a means of control, a control which holds tight
until its possession is weak and brittle."
Jarret nods, going quiet again as he hears her words. He's unable to smile briefly as he watches her,
though.
Susanna glances at Jarret, down at the chessboard again, and digresses. "Forgive me, Sir Jarret. I
am a hypocrite in saying this, anyway. I assured him he was right when he told me. I was afraid for
my position with him as a courtesan. I need work from him for my sisters, but I suppose I traded
their welfare for the justice of others." Susanna leans forward on her knees and pinches the bridge
of her nose. "Please do forget I ever spoke."
"No…" Jarret replies, a bit quietly, before he leans over to place a hand on her shoulder again,
keeping it there for a while. "How can I forget you spoke. People like us… Like Dertan and me, and
those like us, would do good to have people like you around. People who can help us see what power
might blind people to." He offers her a smile, before he adds, "I can agree not to tell others what
you said, but please do not ask me to forget. Even if it might help to drown the pain…"
Susanna looks up at Jarret. "You are far too kind to me," she says quietly, shaking her head, and
then— "Oh, no, no no, I did not wish to bring you more pain with what I said! How thoughtless of me.
Sir Jarret, you were made to be complicit in this thing, weren't you?" she asks earnestly. "It was
not your choice. I…" She huffs. "I know that thought does not often do much to comfort during
helplessness and tragedy. But I look forward to the day when you become duke, Sir Jarret. I have
faith in you. And if you need any sort of assistance at all, you may call on me. If you can stand my
company at all, then you are not alone."
"I…" Jarret begins, before he lets out a breath. "I am not a good man, Susanna. I mean, I drink
too much, I have a bad temper and I do a few more things the church would call sins." He pauses for
a few moments, before he adds, "I wanted the traitor, Mantle, dead for his crime, I cannot deny that.
But I knew, when Mother ordered his family dead, that I could not do that…" He lets out a breath.
"I believe one of the reasons Dertan thinks he was right to do it is that he willingly did so, to
make sure I did not have to." There's a pause as he hears the rest of her words, and he watches her
carefully. "Of course I can stand your company, Susanna. And I hope you can stand mine as well…"
That hand on her shoulder moves to pull her over, and into a hug, if she lets him.
Susanna breathes sharply at the movement, but the hug is more than welcome. She returns it in an
effort to comfort Jarret as well.
"I do not consider myself a good woman, either, Sir. I have far to go before I win a clear
conscience. It is hard to know what makes someone good or bad… But I know you are good. You are,
and have been, good to me, at least. And when doing good is what makes one happy as it does for you,
then I think that's more than enough a thing to have faith in."
Jarret nods a little as he hears her words, and the hug makes him relax a bit. "Thank you," he
replies, words kept rather quiet for now. Letting go, he offers her another smile. "And thank you
for… being here."
Dertan taps briefly on the frame of the door before stepping back inside the library. "I should
apologise for leaving like that."
Susanna relaxes back into a ladylike sitting position and offers Dertan a smile, hands clasped
together as Jarret's words still spin through her head. "I was worried this little battle might
never be ended," she says nodding to the chess board. It is his turn.
Jarret :looks to Dertan, offering him a brief smile. "It's okay, cousin," he replies.
Dertan has one of those moments where he pauses and tries to work out how he wants to react before
he gives a short nod and actually offers a faint smile. "I thought for sure you would have coaxed
Jarret into a game by now." He moves on over to the chess table, looking down at it for a few
moments before looking to Jarret. "You are entirely too forgiving of me Jarret." He moves the piece.
"I almost have the cannon frame done. I just need to work out a way to stop it breaking on the
recoil."
A corner of Susanna's mouth curls upward when Dertan makes his next move. "Is that what you're
calling all this positioning?" Susanna asks, tilting her head and giving the board another once-over.
"I suppose I see what you mean."
Jarret raises an eyebrow at Dertan's words. "Well, if you want I could punch you instead, but that
might hurt my hand, as well as your head, so it's probably best not to do so, right?" It's said with
a straight face, but there's a bit of amusement in his comment.
Dertan lifts an eyebrow at Jarret's answer. "Was I truly that obnoxious Jarret?" He looks back to
Susanna, frowns at little at her comment on positioning and then makes a move that is absolutely out
of keeping with all the other ones he has made so far. He's been playing quite conservatively thus
far but that move was really rather bold.
Susanna chuckles a little at Jarret's joke, and a little bit more at Dertan's comment since he'd
said Jarret was far too forgiving moments before. "I don't think you were, Excellency and I think
that's the point of his Lordship." Then Dertan makes his move and her eyes widen very briefly.
Indeed, the whole game has been transformed. Her brows wrinkle in concentration.